(The person cannot be your significant other or yourself.) This person can be one of your parents, a relative, or a close friend…it just needs to be someone who would feel very comfortable talking to you about his/her relationships.
Using the information on pages 180-180, explain the phases of relational escalation to this person. Make sure your interviewee understands the concepts.
As you explain, ask them about his/her relationship with his/her significant other. What specific behaviors characterized each stage? What happened to move the relationship to the next level? What was the time period for each stage? Does your interviewee agree with the stages? If so, how does their relationship differentiate between one stage and the next?
1. Describe the person you chose to interview and why you selected that person.
2. Describe the relationship of that person to their significant other. If you can, describe the significant other as well.
3. What was the most difficult part of relational development for you to explain? What was the most difficult part of relational development for them to understand?
4. Using the material from the textbook, offer an analysis of the relationship that you discussed in the interview.
5. What did you learn about relationships from this interview? How has this impacted your relationship with the person that you interviewed?
In the Option 1, an interview is conducted with a close relative, who has been married for the last twenty years. The person chosen here for the interview is one of my close relative, my maternal aunt. She is married for a period of twenty years and she explained her relationship with her husband and how they moved to the next level of their relationship and how they passed through the years and how their relationship did grow.
The relationship which she shared with her husband is something from which one can learn the happiness and well being of each long lasting relationship of a couple. She told m
e that she is married for a long time and even after all the ups and downs in a relationship their relationship grew stronger with time (Brown, Manning & Payne,2017). She said that for a long lasting relationship it is crucial that there is open communication between the both of them. She told that in they have a deep understanding about each other strength as well as the flaws and weaknesses; therefore they are able to help them for each other’s growth. She said for a relationship to be successful it is important to have trust and confidence in each other. She told that they both inspired each other on their achievement of goals and aspirations (Gottman, 2014).
There are usually four stages in a relationship. These are as follows:
Stage 1: The Initial Meeting or the infatuation when the relationship usually starts
Stage 2: The second stage is the stage of understanding. It is the stage when the person starts knowing each other well.
Stage 3: The third stage is the stage of enlightenment of becoming a couple. This the stage when the disturbances start
Stage 4: This is the stage of commitment, where it is important to make an opinion
Stage 5: The stage of doubt when it is a difficult phase of the relationship (Gottman & Silver,2015).
Stage 6: It is the last phase when it is the stage of complete trust, love and happiness
The most difficult part of the relationship development for them that she shared can be explained is that when they were initially developing the relationship, they had few problems such as financial constraints and difficulty in adjusting with each other’s traits but gradually they developed the commitment in the relationship with time. The most vital answer that she gave is that it is patience, love and trust in each other that makes a relationship successful. She told me in the interview that during the most difficult and hardest time, it is important to keep the own identity. One should keep their own interest and likes and dislikes, which goes same for both the partners.
The analysis of the interviewee as she described about their relation is that they are married for a long time and she said that during a tough phase of life when she was facing difficulty during their post marriage when they faced financial crisis due to the sudden down fall of her husband, they went through a tough phase of life when things did not turn right for them and they supported each other during this phase of life and she never gave hope and supported her husband, which is important for the long lasting relationship. Thus I feel that after the analysis, it is important for the relationship to develop in order to have a fulfilling and successful married life (Guerrero, Andersen & Afifi, 2017).
Things to learn from a relationship
Firstly, I have learnt that misunderstanding in a relationship is inevitable but all the people needs to understand that the problem should be sorted out before it becomes bigger, thus forgiveness plays a important role in keeping the relationship alive
Secondly, one of the most important things for a healthy and successful relationship is that both the partners shall trust each other. They should have a deep faith in each other so that no matter whatsoever happens and even in the bad times of life both of them is able to support each other (Hasson?Ohayon et al, 2017).
Thirdly, I have learnt that it is important for each other to support so that both of them can grow and prosper in life. Therefore both shall be very encouraging towards each other.
Lastly, it is important to compromise in a relationship. It helps the relationship to grow and therefore it is important that if things are falling in right place, it is important to compromise which will help to stay in a relationship (Roberts & David, 2016).
The person with whom I have taken interview is my aunt, she is truly a motivating and inspiring person and who have shared her experiences and teachings in her life in various situations. She tells to be able to be successful in every sphere of life it is important to persevere and to be sincere and dedicated. In life both good and bad times come, so everybody shall have the patience to deal with each and every situation in life and to support each other during the good or the bad.
Brown, S. L., Manning, W. D., & Payne, K. K. (2017). Relationship quality among cohabiting versus married couples. Journal of Family Issues, 38(12), 1730-1753.
Gottman, J. M. (2014). What predicts divorce?: The relationship between marital processes and marital outcomes. Psychology Press.
Gottman, J., & Silver, N. (2015). The seven principles for making marriage work: A practical guide from the country's foremost relationship expert. Harmony.
Guerrero, L. K., Andersen, P. A., & Afifi, W. A. (2017). Close encounters: Communication in relationships. Sage Publications.
Hasson?Ohayon, I., Peri, T., Rotschild, I., & Tuval?Mashiach, R. (2017). The Mediating Role of Integration of Loss in the Relationship Between Dissociation and Prolonged Grief Disorder. Journal of Clinical Psychology.
Roberts, J. A., & David, M. E. (2016). My life has become a major distraction from my cell phone: Partner phubbing and relationship satisfaction among romantic partners. Computers in Human Behavior, 54, 134-141.
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